I am the "Mother of the Bride..."

#4 and final excerpt from "the book". "Before "Suzie's" wedding I planned to lose 20 pounds, get into shape and find a dress that didn't shout Mother of the Bride. I intended to plan the perfect affair without breaking the bank, breaking a sweat or breaking out in hives. In my spare time, I'd do something about world peace." (In my words here, keep my house clean, my family fed and happy, my bills paid & make sure everyone was where they were suppose to be WHEN they were suppose to be).
Hmmm. Is that why this morning I feel like I had too much coffee but need some more, am very sleep deprived, and still have things that need done today? My phone rang at 6:30 this time, 7:30 home time with an apologetic voice on the other end that says she's sorry but she can't do her car-pool to get the kids to school this morning? (they leave at 7:40) I call my husband 7 time in a row because he doesn't answer, and I get the 14 yr. old who is frantically trying to get out the door because she didn't set her alarm clock this morning and her sister went off and left her, so Dad's getting ready to take HER to school the opposite direction from the younger ones who are suppose to leave now in 5 minutes. To top that all off, Dad's suppose to be leaving in a different direction for an out of town job this morning so he can get back by noon, pick up kids from school, clean the house, pack the stuff that I sent him an e-mail detail list NOT TO FORGET, and get out here for rehearsal tonight. (life in the zoo....without mom at home!)
It's all o.k. We'll all survive, Re-enforcements arrived yesterday noon to help, & two more are are on their way to be here by 9 a.m. this morning. Tomorrow night it will be over & we'll swear up and down not to do _____ or ______again......... until the next wedding.

Kyrie & Trey are running around the house at 6:30 this morning full speed ahead, not a care in the world. I need some of their energy :*)

No more blogging till we're thru here! It's time to boogie, You all have a GREAT LABOR DAY WEEKEND!!
The mother of the bride has spent much more time on the flower girl dresses than her own!

#3. Lycra is the M-O-B's best friend.
#2. Never tell a salesperson that you are looking for a mother-of-the-bride dress. If you do, they'll steer you right to the jacket-dress with sequins section.

#1. "Mother of the bride--the phrase conjures up a vision of a middle-aged woman with the kind of hairdo that doesn't move in a high wind. The mother of the bride wears a pastel jacket to hide her flabby upper arms and matching shoes with arch supports. She carries a purse big enough for her reading glasses. She asks the caterer for decaf. Nobody ever refers to the mother of the bride as "such a pretty girl." I didn't want to see myself that way, but if the arch supports fit..."

These entrys are actually going to be "backwards" in order, as I'm going to add on to this one instead of making new posts this week about this book. I realize many of my blog readers are those who are not in this stage of life. Maybe you can relate for back when you were married. Maybe this is why some of you skipped the whole wedding scene and went for eloping. But, this is my life at this time, so this is what I'm blogging about :*)

So, on with the book:




A present from my bride to be daughter. I haven't let myself indulge in the whole book yet, but enough of it that I can say this is a must read for any mother of the bride! It is absolutely hilarious. I'll be sharing some excerpts from this book over the next couple days while I'm away from home helping my BTB daughter, and my other daughter do all the last minute wedding preparations. (wedding cakes, flower girl dresses & accessories, wedding favors, flowers & decorations)
Here's what the fly leaf has to say about this book:

"When you think "mother of the bride" maybe you picture a proud, serene woman, pulling a neatly folded hanky out of her purse to discreetly blot proud tears from her welling eyes. Well, perhaps this is what you see at the final stages of Operation Wedding, but underneath that tasteful-but-not-too-flashy-and-certainly-not-white dress is a guerrilla deal maker/politico who's been to the edge of madness and has the battle scars to prove it.--

Stay tuned for Scene I.